You better move. You better Dance - Kei$ha knows

We've had an awesome holiday season! Ev and I flew out to Phoenix on xmas eve and spent a week with Ev's parents in retirement heaven - Mesa. I hafta say though, travelling during the holidays is a bitch. As we raced Evan dragged my sorry ass across the Denver airport, we realized that with 5 minutes left until departure, our current location of Gate B85 was still 73 gates away from our departure gate of B12.  I seriously contemplated giving up and draping myself and my angry knee across the moving walkway. The airports were chaotic!

Once we arrived (actually, approximately 22 minutes after we arrived), we settled nicely into retirement life. We drank wine, ate tons of Ev's mom's amazing homemade treats, and lounged/napped by the pool. I have never been so full or relaxed for 5 consecutive days in my life. Proof: I ate so much that the nice little butt I've worked so diligently to "build" has officially overlapped onto my back (AKA: back fat). Dammit. Whatevs. It was so worth it! Proof: One day while snoozing by the pool, I was awaken suddenly by someone's loud snores. I was mortified to realize that it was, in fact, me who was snoring! Now that's relaxation at its finest. Yes, it was fabulous.

In addition to rest and relaxation, my knee hit 2 major milestones in the past week. The knee: 1) ran (like for real this time) and 2) It danced. Extremely exciting.

The run was not intentional. Like my last "rimping" experience, the run was a result of basic human survival instinct. This time it wasn't to escape the frigid air. Nor was it to flee a rabid dog. The run resulted from basic human instinct to score the best deal possible on a purse. You see, there was this lovely black leather Coach purse that I had my eye on. I knew that I would be able to hit up the Coach store in Phoenix, so I had every intention of buying it while I was down there. We found the purse at the Coach store, paid full price for it, and wandered through Dillards on our way to the parking lot. To my dismay, there, in Dillards, sat the exact purse that I had just purchased - 30% off! Dammit! Because they were on sale, they were non-refundable. The purse I had just purchased; however, was refundable. We were in a bit of time crunch, so I advised Ev to pay for the purse at Dillards while I returned the full price one at the Coach Store. Once I got to the store, The saleslady assured me that she would price match Dillards. Shit. I had to get back to Dillards before Ev put that purse on our credit card; otherwise, I would have 2 identical pricey purses.

So, I did what any woman would do in a purse emergency. I ran. This time, cognizant of my form, I was actually able to inhibit the one legged long jump and sorta kinda run like a normal person. Sweat pouring down my face, the urgency of the situation driving me to persevere, I ran with desperation into Dillards. Like a slow motion scene from a movie, just as Evan was about to slide that credit card through the machine, completing the fatal transaction, I hollered,

"EEEEEEEVVVVVVVVAAAAAANNNNNNN   NOOOOOOOOO!"

I saved the sale. It was pretty epic. Thank you, Coach kiosk in Dillards for helping me run again. I am forever indebted to you. To show my appreciation, I vow to purchase a new Coach purse every season.

As if that wasn't amazing enough, something totally and unbelievably awesome happened on New Year's Eve. At a cold little hall in Lily Plain, Saskatchewan, I danced. I legit danced for the first time in 19 months. The cartilage was in it's finest form, ready and willing to rip up that dance floor well into the new year. The knee poured some sugar on me with Def Lepoard. It Thriftshopped with Maclamore, it smelled the whiskey burnin' down Copperhead Road with Steve Earle, and it S & M'd with Rihanna. No crutches. No cane. No walls to hang onto. It was independent, legit Friday night Muchmusic Electric Circus-style dancing. Luckily, the DJ, donning a classic Bill Cosby sweater, was on the brutal side. When he slid in lame-ass songs (How the hell do you dance to "wrecking ball"?) I had a chance to take a break, have a seat, and numb the knee with vodka. It was an awesome night! Although I woke up the next morning with a bit of a hangover (OK, a bad hangover), the knee wasn't even swollen or angry. Confidence is high, my friends. What a great way to ring in the new year!

Thank you, Lily Plain Hall, for helping me get my groove back. Fantastic.

I clearly recall my feelings of fear and hopelessness one year ago when I worried what 2013 had in store for me. How things can change in a year! I am one lucky girl. I can't wait to see what 2014 brings. Happy New Year everyone!

My dancing buddies!!